Just call me q

A woman contemplating life, incognito

I’m No Ex-Batt Expert But…

Jan
11

 

You may or may not know but, over Christmas, Fork (my No. Three In Command hen) was taken ill and spent a good week and a bit living in a cardboard box on my dining room floor.

cartoon picture of an ill ex-battery chicken in a cardboard box

 

Anyone For A Dried Worm?

I fed her a whole host of things includingΒ a pureed baby food sachet of fish pie and broccoli, dried worms, egg yolk, hen pellets, baby milk, warm porridge, plain yogurt with crushed garlic and cooked mixed veg, and – thankfully – she regained enough strength to be able to be re-introduced to her hen-friends in time for New Years Eve.

And the whole process, well, I’ll admit that it wasn’t easy. It cost me a bomb; I spent an inordinate amount of time googling ‘how to plump up a chicken but not for the oven’ and, as for the physio sessions… they were a complete waste of time because (as I now know) a sick chick will not do a thigh stretch until it’s good and ready.

 

cartoon picture of food for an ill chicken

 

I’m No Ex-Batt Expert But…

But the end result of this super expensive and extremely intensive TLC session over the festive season was that Fork – my previously poorly and almost at death’s doorly (sorry, about that) chicken – survived. Yes, she made it and I could not be happier because, apart from making me realise that I love her dearly and that her two hen friends love her dearly, she also made me realise that, okay, so I’m no ex-batt expert but… on the other hand, I’m no novice either.

Scratching Around In The Saw-Dust

And so, with that in mind, I have decided to (temporarily) branch out into the niche world of chickens; ex-battery chickens, to be more precise. Yes, and I am going to spend the rest of January, February and possibly March scratching around in the saw-dust and digging (I mean, dishing) the dirt on the messy, feathery and sometimes downright dangerous lives of the chicken-keeper.

 

cartoon picture of ex-battery chickens and fork

 

Duh-duh-durnnnnn.

(To be continued…)

2 Responses to I’m No Ex-Batt Expert But…

  1. Just glad that Fork made it through. I hope she realises how c-lucky she is! (I’ll just get my coat)

    • Dear Jo,
      thankyou for your concern. No, I don’t think Fork DOES realise how c-lucky she is. I am going to go straight out into my back garden to LET HER KNOW.

      Love from Q

      Ps: You seem to be very talented at cracking yokes.

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